“We watch the alcoholic performing in a position of responsibility and we know that because he is drinking heavily and daily he has cut his capacities by 50 percent, and still he seems able to do a satisfactory job. And we wonder how much further this man could go if his alcoholic problem could be removed and he could throw 100 percent of his abilities into action. But, of course …eventually the alcoholic loses all of his capacities as his disease gets progressively worse, and this is a tragedy that is painful to watch; the disintegration of a sound mind and body.” – Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Alcoholics Anonymous Number Three, Ch 12 (“The Keys of the Kingdom”), p 308.
Today, as a sober alcoholic, can I remember or even acknowledge the gradual and steady disintegration of myself as a drinking alcoholic? If I cannot, I must remember to appreciate and even treasure that the Program and recovery have moved me forward and beyond that abyss of irrevocable physical, emotional and spiritual hopelessness and self-destruction. And in comparing then to now, I can rely on my Higher Power to strengthen me should temptation or a potential relapse arise. Today, despite or in spite of any problems I face, I must be grateful that I am not making them worse by drinking or using. I prefer whatever challenges I face sober instead of those I had drunk. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M., 2014